I don't think we should have started that trash fire
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
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