Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
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I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
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Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
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