i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
Randomize
