I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I left myself a trail of jello shots, that ended at his door. OR maybe he left me a trail of jello shots at his door. DO I GO IN!?
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
I can't trust your balls anymore.
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