good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I'm going to bed early so football can come sooner
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
You were like a drunk and unconscious tickle me elmo.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
