we have pet lesbian snakes
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
