we have pet lesbian snakes
Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
