we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
