I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
Randomize
