But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
