he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Randomize
