Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
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Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
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Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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