I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Found myself carrying 2 bottles of .89 euro wine about half a mile to where im staying. and someone stopped me and spoke to english. apparently, i reek of drunk american.
When I blacked in, I was crying to my father at the swim-up bar that "I was going to win an Oscar." how do you THINK Mexico was?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
It's blow job season.
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
