It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
