Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
