Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
