Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
