Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
You called it motorboating but you just snot rocketed into my tits.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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