The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize