There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
Randomize
