That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
