There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
