Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
