she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
Randomize
