Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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