i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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