There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
I get dinner and bf perks from the one guy. But dick with no commitment from the other. I’m living my best life.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
