Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
All I found in my purse this morning was 160 cigarettes and a fistful of confetti.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
