my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
