That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
Randomize
