Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
You threw up on yourself, then proceeded to tell us "to not make a mess in your car"
Sitting on the curb by new england comics with a weeping drunk girl who's eating french fries saying she'll never be as successful as her sister the hand model. She's scaring the nerds.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Randomize
