D3 body, D1 cock
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
What the fuck am I going to do with a pinata full of tampons?
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
