You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
Randomize
