i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I'm too high and old for this...
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
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