It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
His mom said he was in the ER and asked for prayers and positive thoughts. Apparently, me wishing the clap on him is not what she had in mind.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Randomize
