Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize