you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
