I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Omg. One night stands are not supposed to show up to your swim class the morning after. Worst lesson ever.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
