Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
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