At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
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you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
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I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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