I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize