Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
Our funnel is on top of our neighbors roof.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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