I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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