Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
