afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
It's really too bad Cosmo doesn't have "What To Do When You've Drunkenly Sucked His Dick and He Doesn't Text You Back" article.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
