I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
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