Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I will be naked everywhere
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize