you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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