that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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