making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Randomize
