dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize
